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The Mechanics Of Yenagoa (XIII)
Post Series: Mechanics of Yenagoa

I did the walk of shame. I came out from under the bed with the tell-tale signs of my accidental voyeurism splattered on my grey sweat shorts. In that moment, my mind went to Cersei from the Game of Thrones. In my case though, I was thankful for the semi-darkness in the room and the frenzy of trying to revive Sister Agnes. Most importantly, I was thankful for the absence of a sea of spectators as I tried to regain my composure.

I helped Saka lift his woman from the floor and unto the bed. Her modesty covered up with my family’s defiled bed sheet. At this point, I had completely forgotten about the guns hidden in the room because what was uppermost in my mind was making sure that we didn’t have a dead girl in our hands. It would be very difficult to explain that away to law enforcement authorities.

A visibly shaken Saka shook her body as he called out her name, “Agnes, Agi, Agi–”
He didn’t realise his voice was rising, so I tried hushing him up but my apprentice brushed aside my concern for discretion with so much ferocity I almost landed on the floor. Saka tried stirring her back to consciousness by saying her name repeatedly, something I didn’t think was a good idea because I didn’t want the other guys in the house in on the unfolding drama in the guestroom. I was hoping that between him and me we could somehow contain the situation and avoid the scandal that was sure to erupt if Biodun and BRD became involved.

I steadied myself and cautioned Saka again to bring down his voice, but it was too late.

Biodun and Broderick came bursting into the room like the pair of Aki and Paw-Paw with humongous rechargeable lamps pointed at a shocked and traumatised Saka and I. One of them had a machete and the other was holding a spanner. I didn’t know whether to let them stay or order them back to their room. Before I could decide what option was best, given that we still had an unconscious woman to worry about, Biodun I think it was, summed up courage and asked the one question I didn’t want to hear.

“Oga Ebinimi, Saka, wetin dey happen for here?”

In that moment, it took only a few seconds for me to assess the situation and analyse the options: it didn’t look good at all. There was me in my shorts and singlet, looking distressed. Beside me was an unclad Saka, and on the bed was a partially exposed Sister Agnes. I could only imagine what was going through their minds of how the three of us were into some kind of freaky shit.

“Una…una dey alright so?” This time I was sure who it was. It was Broderick.

“When…when we hear…hear…hear shout, we been think say na…na…na thief people don enter house oh,” Biodun added, stuttering from obvious confusion.

“No be sister Agnes dey on top–”

“Why una dey ask question like say una be police when want to collect money from keke man?” I barked at BRD. “Enter kitchen bring water for me jor, make we see how we go wake this girl, before this matter gather muscle.”

Broderick and Biodun scurried out of the room to do as I asked, while a distraught Saka reached for his cloths and put them back on. The boys came back with a bucket of water each, but we only needed one to do the trick.

When Sister Agnes regained consciousness, Saka broke down in tears and she joined him. Understandably, she couldn’t look any of us guys in the eyes, and I couldn’t quite make out if the words she was muttering was her saying thank you to us for saving her life or for looking away as she got back into her cloths.

I ordered all of them out of the guestroom so I could be alone. I couldn’t imagine my body on that bed without some form of cleansing by Reverend Ebizimor or anyone else I could find first thing in the morning. So, I sat on the cold tiled floor trying to figure out what just happened. With what transpired a short while ago, I doubted anyone was going to ask me what I was doing in the guestroom of my own house. They dared not. The real question should be what Saka and the born again chorister, and sometimes usher of the church in my compound were doing in my guestroom at that time of the night.

As I sat down in the dark, listening to the sounds of the night, I couldn’t help wondering if it was a sign for me to discontinue with my plans of helping Honourable Aaron destroy a political foe through his son. Apart from stealing Adinna away from me, Aguero had been a good friend. Cross that, he was like the brother I never had. Did I really want to put someone that was once that close to me through such a terrible ordeal and make him suffer for the sins of his father?

I didn’t know how long I sat down there in the dark, pondering my next move, but when I found strength to get back on my feet, my mind was made up. I didn’t care whether anyone saw me or not. I didn’t have to tiptoe or try not to bump into anything or anyone in the hallway. I didn’t care how loudly the front door creaked when I opened it or what dangers were lurking in the yard at that time of the night. What had to be done must be done.

Everything fitted into two medium-sized ghana-must-go bags that I carried by myself to the boot of Aguero’s car, which was already positioned for my convenience behind a huge truck in the workshop. After making sure the trunk was firmly locked, I went into the house and confirmed the same thing for the guestroom door. Back in my room, I changed into a blue and white striped cotton pyjama bottom before jumping into bed. From across the fence just by my window, my neighbour’s annoying cock did its thing, which was how I knew it was exactly 4am.

I’m sure I started snoring before my head hit the pillow. Sleep was sweet and filled with dreams of Sister Agnes doing sweet things to me.


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This Post Has 3 Comments
  1. Any witty, sacarstic book gets my heart at first read. I love it when problems keep arising from solved problems. I’m eager for the next episode

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