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The Mechanics Of Yenagoa (Season 2) – III
Post Series: Mechanics of Yenagoa

I uploaded Saka’s video three days after I shot it. You really don’t want to know how the last couple of days have been for me trying to figure out what could have happened to Tiekuro, and how the mystery of his disappearance could be resolved so his family would know one way or the other if he was dead or alive.

It broke my heart when his dad said he prayed every day that nothing bad had happened to his son. I have been praying the same prayer too, but if it was a prayer that couldn’t be answered, then let them at least find a body so the process of mourning and healing could begin for his father and siblings.

The judge admitted to me that evening that Tiekuro was a handful, but a living Tiekuro could change. A dead one couldn’t, and that wasn’t the memory any father should have of his first son. Honestly, if I hadn’t met his father that day, I wouldn’t have known that Teikuro was to have left for the UK in September to restart his degree programme following his rustication from the last Nigerian university he attended.

For me, I’d give anything to chat with him or his ghost or even an apparition of him. This time not to ask about him abandoning me, but to get the full story of what happened to him and Oyintari and that other guy after they left me bleeding. The most annoying thing was that I had lost Oyintari’s number. It used to be in my phone, but it must have somehow disappeared when I went to have my handset fixed at Banex Plaza in Abuja.

Like most of my recent problems, it was really frustrating that I couldn’t confide in anyone what I was going through, and especially what I knew. I was probably the last person that saw him that day and speaking up would probably expedite the investigations into his whereabouts. But then again, letting out what I knew could open up a can of worms, and that wouldn’t be good for me at all. So, the question I’ve been asking myself since I spoke with Justice Digha was whether or not I should go to the police.

“Ebinimi, wetin happen? It’s like you’re not happy to see me.” Blessing, hitting me with a pillow, brought me back to the present. “No tell me say you don go jam one babe for Abuja oh?”

“Why would you even think that, ehn Blessing?”

“Why I no go think like that? I don dey with you for this house since yesterday and you never touch me better touch. Abi the beat when dem beat you two months ago affect Johnny?”

The way she said it made me chuckle. “Na who dey teach you all this nonsense talk sef? After you go dey do robobo…rababa with Reverend Ebizimor like say na you holy pass.”

“Me I dey go baff. When I come out of baffroom, na only perfume go dey my body –”

“You even still get time to spray perfume? After, you go say you don miss me. Abeg hurry come back jare, make me I show you in five strong ways how much I’ve missed you.”

Just as Blessing left for the bathroom, Aguero called to accuse me of not letting him know I was back in town. I apologised to him and promised to see him in the morning. That was another situation that still filled me with guilt. I hung up the phone, and while waiting for Blessing to join me in bed, I started fiddling with my phone and stumbled on the video recording of Saka, Biodun and BRD doing their crazy remix of Victor AD’s song. After three days, I still thought it was hilarious.

I wanted to post it on my Instagram page, but then I thought it was better to create a new account and that was what I did.  Within minutes, the handle, ‘Mechanics of Yenagoa’ had its first post. I tagged Tunde Ednut, Instablog, Ono Bello, Linda Ikeji and Bella Naija. I also tagged Victor Ad and myself.

Blessing was still in the bathroom and small Johnny – oh sorry, I meant to say big Johnny – was getting really impatient so we both decided to pay her a visit in the shower. If I was to get through five before morning, the earlier I started, the better.

As it turned out, my woman was convinced after two so we collapsed under the duvet and called it a night. But Blessing wasn’t ready for sleep. She cleared her throat and called me baby.

“You never sleep?” I asked, pulling her closer and hoping for a third.

“Something dey bother me. I don dey struggle with myself for the past four days whether make I tell you, abi make I just mind my business and let the matter rest.”

“What is that?” I jumped out of the bed. Because she sounded really serious, for a minute I thought she knew about the Tiekuro saga.

“Ebinimi, this one strong. Ha! E heavy me for mouth!”

“If Omawumi fit talk her own, how your own come take heavy reach? Talk jor, you know say I no dey like make person dey keep me for suspense.”

“Where I want to start from?”

“You might want to tell me if this is about us or something else.”

“It’s not about us; it’s about your sister,” Blessing turned to face me, but in the dark I couldn’t see her face.

“Ebiakpo?” I almost fell out of the bed trying to sit up straight. “Blessing, I hope this isn’t another conspiracy theory about her and Reverend Ebizimor again oh?”

“Why are you talking like this ehn? This is exactly why I didn’t want to bring this up with you in the first place because you probably wouldn’t even believe me. But this time I have pictures.”

“Pictures of my sister and her pastor?”

“No, pictures from the marriage I went for.”

“You’ve lost me, Blessing. Please tell me what you want to tell me so it makes sense. I no fit begin dey solve riddle this night.”

“Remember I was away in Port Harcourt for the weekend? I had a make-up and styling job to do there for a friend of a friend of a friend who was getting married.”

“You’re not that close with this person, I get it,” I interjected to speed up her narration.

“Yes, you’re right. The bride isn’t really my friend, so I didn’t know anything about the arrangement for the occasion or the person she was getting married to. So Ebinimi, you can imagine my shock when the groom arrived the venue of the ceremony with his friends and it was your brother-in-law.”

“Benson? Benson Emeledo?”

“Sister Ebiakpo’s husband.” She reached for her phone and showed me the pictures. It was true. Benson wearing a black bowler hat, a red namatebe – you know those woolly fabrics with lion heads everywhere and a matching black trousers locked lips with a light-skinned big-bosomed girl wearing a colour-coordinated wrapper, blouse and gele. Except Benson was now an actor in Nollywood or a model for Niger Delta attire, then Blessing was right. The guy don blindside my sister!

Please, can someone tell me this, if you found out that your sister’s husband of so many years has just married another woman behind her back, how would you break the news to her?



This Post Has 5 Comments
  1. Chai Benson wan kill Ebiakpo o. See wicked thing. If Rev Ebizimor never marry, then Ebiakpo still get hope.
    Nice episode. Great one

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