People have told several lies about love and most of these fables you were gullible enough to believe, amongst which is ‘love is pain’.

Subconsciously, you had prepared yourself for a love that has some pain, love that would fit into the definition of pain, a beautiful pain. You liked to use this oxymoron to justify the cruel things he did to you. You replayed the phrase in your mind every time he beat you and even after you found out about the other woman. The one who made him come home late sully and stench-woven from alcohol, sweat and sex while you waited on the couch to have the taste of his stale explanation, which somehow made you feel better, which somehow dried your tears, which somehow drowned the screams you had vowed to speak when he arrived.

‘What is love without pain?’ Your mother had said when you went to her home to complain.

‘No marriage is perfect, my child. You are a woman; you have to be strong and resilient,’ she had advised.

And she went on to tell you her story, her mother’s story and her grandmother’s story. How they had endured the pains that came with their marriages. Only fragile women leave marriages because of pains.

You had convinced yourself she was right. The wounds on your back were healing. The throbbing pains between your thighs would stop soon. The love bites on your face would be covered with Zaron too. At least he always came home to you; at least your name was still on the marriage certificate.

What is love without pains?

But you weren’t as resilient as your mother had hoped. You didn’t mind her lividity and stern disapproval when you announced you wanted a divorce. Now, you moan another man’s name as he touches you in places your first husband never did. You moan this beautiful love you have found so loud until it crippled the sound of your sober first husband who wants you back. He tries to brainwash you again that he deserves a second chance. Now you live a beautiful love story, although not without occasional disagreements and bickers, but a love without pain.

You realise that love isn’t pain, love isn’t. Humans are the ones who placed their insidious thorns on what love really is. Love is a lot of things, but love isn’t pain.

Written by : Michael Afenfia

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41 Comments

  1. […] Love is a Lot of Things by Azeeza Adeowu […]

    • Sagir February 3, 2018 at 11:26 am - Reply

      Nice one

    • Adeyemo Jubilation Habeeb February 4, 2018 at 5:11 am - Reply

      Great job, Zee. Love is indeed not pain, but emotional Likeness or Feelings.

  2. Fathia February 3, 2018 at 7:39 am - Reply

    You write so beautifully Zee. Pain isn’t love, especially pain that comes in form of physical and emotional torture.

  3. Kenny February 3, 2018 at 9:17 am - Reply

    Humans are the one ones who place their insidious thorns on what love really is.. 😢
    I love that sentence, I love the entire story actually. 😍

  4. Bolanle Rauf February 3, 2018 at 9:19 am - Reply

    Nice story. Thumps up Girl. 😆😆

  5. Omosalewa February 3, 2018 at 9:32 am - Reply

    Beautiful and enlightening. We really need to change that narrative of love being synonymous with pain. Love is beautiful and only love can change the world. Humans are the one who choose to inflict pain on the one they claim they love.

  6. Ara February 3, 2018 at 9:34 am - Reply

    Very well said
    Nice one

  7. Olayinka February 3, 2018 at 9:41 am - Reply

    A man who truly cares about a woman will not dare inflict a mark on her body so pain isn’t sincere love

  8. Maryam February 3, 2018 at 10:30 am - Reply

    love is a lot of things. love is what I feel for you and this beautiful piece!

  9. Hanamel February 3, 2018 at 10:48 am - Reply

    Love is as beautiful as this insightful piece. We have distorted love so badly to fit it into our selfish definitions. Love is elusive to a lot of people who delude themselves about the knowledge of love. Love is Love, no matter how we twist it into a grotesque mask. Currently, the world lack but need love. If only we can go back to our innocence as kids. Weldone Deezer.

    • Zyzah February 3, 2018 at 5:22 pm - Reply

      I know right, everyone tries to fit love into a definition that fits their selfish interests. I read in a book recently that nowadays, “only Kids know and feel the true definition of love.” although I don’t completely agree, it got me thinking.
      And thanks for the beautiful comment.

  10. Priceless February 3, 2018 at 12:27 pm - Reply

    A nice piece you have there. Wish you success in the competition.

  11. mss_pheenah February 3, 2018 at 2:13 pm - Reply

    Love is a lot of things, Love is a sense of being,
    Love is what the mind is seeing, You can’t stay without love in life, It is truly tough to survive,
    Coz love completes life on the whole, It is the destination, the most important role, Love is everything for me, love is what i feel reading this piece
    ….. Go girl

  12. Aishah Ojibara February 3, 2018 at 2:16 pm - Reply

    Great job, Azeeza

  13. Moon Wills February 3, 2018 at 2:29 pm - Reply

    A friend once told me that love, the hyped euphoria and everything, all depends on the person you’re in it with. we often find ourselves building up excuses to cover the sores that love inflicts on us…but it’s true, pain is not love.
    Though there’s a twist in every story, but love is full of respect and memories to adorn. love may hurt sometimes, but not every time.
    This is an excellent piece, Azeeza…it’s a job well done. I hope this goes a long way out there, it’s actually an answer to lots of questions. It’s a great read!

  14. Esther February 3, 2018 at 2:36 pm - Reply

    Beautiful piece

  15. Firdausi February 3, 2018 at 3:48 pm - Reply

    Thumbs up sweety

  16. Robinson mekus February 3, 2018 at 3:52 pm - Reply

    keep on keeping on

  17. Bliss chima February 3, 2018 at 4:44 pm - Reply

    “Love is a lot of things but love isn’t pain”
    I love that sentence, I love the write up. Keep it up.

  18. Bello Fathyma February 3, 2018 at 6:41 pm - Reply

    Bitter truth.. Indeed love isn’t pain neither z it blind

  19. Gabbiskpoki February 3, 2018 at 6:42 pm - Reply

    Beautifully written dear. Love comes in all direction and it also pays. Best of luck dear

  20. Ene February 3, 2018 at 6:47 pm - Reply

    👍 Zee, my best writer

  21. Phateemah Musa February 3, 2018 at 7:07 pm - Reply

    Nice one as always dear. U write very beautifully

  22. Asabah February 3, 2018 at 7:13 pm - Reply

    azeeza ds z beautiful…if only more women can av dat courage as ur character,den d will realise dat luv zn’t pain,rada it cmes with a hapi endn

  23. Yemmy February 3, 2018 at 7:19 pm - Reply

    Nice write up…. Love is beautiful with the right person by your side

  24. Hauwa February 3, 2018 at 7:29 pm - Reply

    This is so beautiful… Of course love is a lot of positive things.

  25. Falola R.O February 3, 2018 at 8:02 pm - Reply

    Quite deep and insightful. We all really need to wake up and do away with the traditional idea of love. Nice one Azeezat

  26. Aminat February 3, 2018 at 8:18 pm - Reply

    Nice write-up…

  27. Hussein February 3, 2018 at 9:19 pm - Reply

    Cool write up!

  28. Msleek February 3, 2018 at 9:37 pm - Reply

    Mad over this piece

  29. Ousmarn February 3, 2018 at 9:56 pm - Reply

    Well written, keep it up love!

  30. Maryam.O February 3, 2018 at 10:04 pm - Reply

    Love is sure a whole lot of things….Most interesting piece I’ve seen about love in a while….and then my fav:Love isn’t pain….and it never will

  31. Maryam.O February 3, 2018 at 10:06 pm - Reply

    Love is sure a whole lot of things….Most interesting piece I’ve seen about love in a while….and then my fav:Love isn’t pain….and it never will be

  32. Rouff February 3, 2018 at 10:54 pm - Reply

    Cool one

  33. Atari February 4, 2018 at 1:14 am - Reply

    Indeed love isn’t pain, love rather is ki

  34. rahmiee February 4, 2018 at 10:46 am - Reply

    ……luv is something so sweet felt from deep within. Its sure isnt pain. Nice piece n goodluck dear

  35. Omolara A February 4, 2018 at 6:04 pm - Reply

    I love this story, I love how it was told too.
    “She went on to tell you her story, her mother’s story, her grandmother’s story”
    You write well.

  36. Muhammad Olatunji February 4, 2018 at 8:01 pm - Reply

    Love! The way people throw that word around without knowing or twisting the meaning to suit their selfish reasons. Love is true and pure. The greatest love is the one from parent to children. Goodluck zee.

  37. Gimba Jr. February 5, 2018 at 9:02 am - Reply

    Quite Nice.

  38. Gimba Jr. February 5, 2018 at 9:05 am - Reply

    Still wondering what other lies were told about love though.

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